Katniss' Kitty-Mommy

Remember my previous post about pro-life and pro-choice and how it was all about a lack of responsibility in our society?

Well, It turns out I'm just as guilty as everyone else.

 Here I was, preaching about the pros and cons of birth control and how education just wasn't cutting down pregnancy rates, I didn't even notice...

(I close my eyes, shake my head and sigh in severe self loathing and shame)

Katniss...Katniss was pregnant, and pretty far along.

I live in a two-story house. I occupy an upstairs studio and my grandmother uses the first story. When I got her, Katniss was intended to be an indoor cat. I wanted her to stay upstairs in my studio apartment when I'm not home. However, when I am gone Katniss gets lonely and my grandma will let her roam around outside.

At first I would try to explain to my grandmother that Katniss couldn't go galavanting outside because she was not spayed. Grandma would invulnerably say "Oh, yes, we don't want her to get pregnant." And yet, she would persist in the behavior that I EXPLICITLY ASKED HER NOT TO DO!

It got to the point to where I would would be downstairs with Katniss doing laundry or something and GRANDMA goes over and opens the FRONT DOOR! GAAAAHHHH.

What did I do? Did I buy a pen and keep her upstairs all the time? Did I spend the money and effort to take her in to get fixed?

No, I was too busy with school and work. I didn't want to think about it.

Then Katniss is sitting on my lap with this stomach porturding  out of either side. I can feel that it's not normal cat stomach, it's baby-kitties inside her.

Initially I was very, very, extremely reluctant to terminate the pregnancy. Babies aren't supposed to die. They're supposed to grow! I agonized over knowing that I couldn't care for a liter of baby kitties, and that fact...babies...even non-human ones...are NOT supposed to die.

I think my family was ultimately proud of my big girl decision to have her be spayed and the pregnancy ended. Still I am a bit ashamed to say I didn't even do that part myself, except to make an appointment to have my sister take Katniss and Tigerlily (My dad's "Outdoor" cat who also lives in my house) to get spayed.

I think I did the right thing, I know I couldn't have cared for a litter of kitties and I couldn't have found them homes. But the thing that still gets me is that I wasn't a responsible kitty-mommy. Because the REAL "Right Thing" to do was to get her spayed while she was still young. Which I didn't do.