What's Really Wrong With Frozen

A while back, I went to see the movie Frozen with my youngest sister Debbers.

I enjoyed the film despite some of its obvious (to me) imperfections. I came to enjoy it even more, because it was something I could share with my younger sister, who promptly became a big fan: filling her music playlist and bedroom with some of the Frozen merchandise and sharing with me trivia she'd learned about the story, the development of the film, the symbolism behind song lyrics and certain objects in the film (such as gloves and doors which were intentionally used in the story to suggest emotional barriers between certain characters etc.)

The film is a coming-of-age story about two sisters who are princesses of a small Norse kingdom. It has a lot of music, and its basically what western culture has come to know as a 'Disney Princess Movie' with a minor twist in the trope at the very end.

For Debbers, the story is beyond reproach so when I shared my criticisms of the film, she was quick to defend them. I didn't share my criticisms of the film in depth, and because they are minor I hadn't planned on sharing them here until I read a certain review.

The film has recently received notice in the mormon-blogger community because it has been seen as an allegory for rebellion of young people. Also it is seen as promoting acceptance of homosexual behavior. Some see it as part of an adjenda by Hollywood to brainwash children, others see it as a result of our culture's increasing acceptance of homosexuality.

Most of the criticism is aimed at one of the characters: Elsa of Arendalle-The older of the two princesses-and a song she sings at a pivitol point in her character development called 'Let It Go'.

(If you'd like to read the analysis in depth, I'd encourage you to consult the original source, but be warned it may change the way you interpret the meaning of the lyrics in the film.)

To me the interpretation is a bit far-fetched. Embracing people who are different is hardly a new topic in children's media, neither is rebellion an uncommon topic in coming of age stories. So what makes Frozen different? 

I came to the conclusion, that because the issues involved with the moral implications of homosexuality that we face today, we are thinking of the issue more often and thus are more likely to see it in media around us.

(I want to be clear, this movie is no 'Fern Gully'. There is no reference to homosexuality, and the 'rebellion' involves an emotionally unstable individual who is trying to not kill people...no bleeding trees neither.)

Something else occurred to me though, with all of this criticism. None of them saw what was REALLY wrong with it.

As I said earlier, I thought they were obvious to people and relatively minor...hardly worth bringing up...really...

But maybe not. Maybe I was the only one not blinded by musings on homosexuality, or enamored with the story itself to see what the story was really about (and who the bad guys really were)


I'll start with the lesbian woman and the war-anthem first:

Elsa: She's compassionate, wise, selfless, talented, and professional.  For me it was hard not to identify with her and the journey she is going through.

BUT SHE HARDLY EVER TALKS!! I'm serious-after her encounter with the Trolls Elsa is consumed with fear and isolates herself to the point where she can't even carry out conversations through a door.

Elsa does have one song she sings solo, but it's a song about herself and doesn't give insight into her worldview or how she feels about her family or the relationships she's had to sacrifice. It's not like the elsa-voice-actor can't talk too, cuz she was in a whole movie where all she did was talk an NOT sing at all.

This choice was unfortunate and limited Elsa as a character. But the filmakers get away with it by swiftly changing the POV from Elsa to her sister Anna after the beginning of the movie.

(In other words, Anna-the girl with the false childhood memories-does most of the talking/expressing in the movie.)

'Let It Go': This song has so much praise, and so much criticism...many people seem to miss that

 IT'S A FEW NOTES OFF FROM BEING A 'DEFYING GRAVITY' RIP OFF!!!

(Elsaba...)

Seriously! The songs sound very, very similar in lyrics, in melody, and in meaning. I feel that Elphaba missed out on becoming a lesbian icon, because unfortunately she already had a male love interest.



Anna: People are so busy criticizing Elsa's character arc, they forget that most of the story is about Anna's journey.

Anna learns how to discern love from flattery, and how important it is to demonstrate unconditional love.

However, Anna is also awkward and gullible. I feel Disney was using her to make a point about girls taking 'Disney Princess' stories to heart too much. I keep thinking 'This is how Disney Co. sees girls who idolize their own franchise.

Anna never realizes what her sister did to protect her. She never regains memory and she is not told of her childhood accident, even though she spends the majority of the movie with the only human being outside of her immediate family who saw it happen and even has a musical number with the beings who healed her from it.

(LAME!)

Just as Elsa's lack of verbal expression limits her range as a character, this knowledge deficit limits Anna's ability to grow as a character, negatively impacting the emotional range of the story.

Kristoff: This one is hard, because I consider him to be my favorite character in the film. He's down-to-earth, level-headed, rugged, brave, and loyal. But when Anna is injured by ice, he ADMITS that he  remembers her previous ice injury and subsequent healing.

YET HE TELLS HER NOTHING ABOUT IT!!!

Maybe he's really, really stupid. Or maybe he was instructed to not tell anyone about it. We're never shown. But in the end, it makes him look like he's keeping information that might be helpful to Anna out of pride.

('I know something you don't know na-na-na')

On a side note, I've learned that Kristoff is not of norse ancestry (or at least, not a full blooded norse-man) he is part of the indigenous people's in northern europe called the Sami. Some people have called bluff on the fact that Kristoff appears white, and while many of the Sami people today do appear white, many fewer would have had the pale skin/blond hair combination during the time period that this movie is meant to takes place.

The story gets away with not explaining Kristoff's family history and cultural heritage by suggesting (rather late in the story) that he is an orphan...

(Really dude? Who gave you the reindeer?)

This brings out another issue...

Race and face: This gripe has less to do with the story itself, then the Disney producers and the designers who created it. This story is loosely connected with a story called 'The Ice Queen' which was written by Hans Christian Anderson, and the story was meant to take place in Northern Europe. Of course, most of the inhabitants of northern europe during the time that this story takes place are pale skinned (not everyone, but the majority of people). It follows, that most of the characters Frozen will be pale skinned also (except for perhaps the Sami people, as previously mentioned).

My gripe is why did they choose yet-another-story-about-white-people when they know people are hungering for a story about POC?

(It's not like there aren't African fairy-tales...I've read some of them and they're really good.)


The answer is apparently, 'We've been planing this one for a long time' and 'POC are harder to design and animate'.

(I think what they mean is; 'We, the animators, are afraid of designing faces for women who are not conventionally attractive. If a woman doesn't have pale skin (with freckles), freakishly huge eyes and a button nose, people will say she's ugly. And we can't have an ugly disney princess).

I know, some people are always going to hate on the way POC are represented: An arabic group didn't like the way Jasmine looked, a native american group doesn't like Pocahantas' age (and lets not get started on Tiana...). Everyone wants to (culturally) feel like they 'own' an powerful icon like a disney princess. But we don't, Disney does.

Hans:

Hans is a beautiful character. I loved him from the beginning. If the story actually focused on him as a main character, he might even kick Kristoff of my 'Favorite Frozen Character' podium.

The first Disney Prince who is also a Disney Villain is a delightful title to have.

The scene where his true motivations are revealed was my favorite part of the story. However, I'm not convinced his identity as villain was well thought out.

Several of the fan-pages point to 'Evidence' of Hans' true motivations early in the story. For instance, he saves Elsa's life from an archer whilst also trying to kill her by re-directing the arrow at a chandelier on the ceiling.

Um...I saw that happening in the movie...it occurred over a split second, and he seemed to carry it out reflexively. He would have had to think--and act--very, very fast in order to have 'stop-a-murder-to-cause-a-murder' as his design. How would it have implicated himself had he failed to stop the arrow? He could be seen as equally at fault in either scenario.

If indeed Hans had this grand-albiet fluid- design that involved a split second decision like this...then he is a brilliant, brilliant man and I admire his vicious, diabolical cunning!

But as evil plots go, it doesn't make a lot of sense and would have required more explanation.
I later learned that this character was developed as a villain by default...

Originally Frozen was meant to be the first 'Disney Princess Movie' where a Disney Princess is also a Disney Villainess.

(That's right,it's Elsa!)

Elsa's status as villain was changed after her War-anthem, 'Let It Go' was written.
Instead of being evil and a force of destruction, Elsa becomes a creator and a protector.

But SOMEONE has to be the bad guy! And why not make it a 'nice guy' with alterior motives?
Instead of a princess, why not a prince?

And so, no matter what tragic backstory the author's of this programmed have designed as Hans' 'Reason for being evil'

The real reason he is evil, is because nobody else wanted the job.

The Trolls:

The trolls never told Anna her backstory either, which is extremely lame. But the fact that their existence and purpose is taken for granted by the plot is even more lame.

From what I've read on Norse mythology, Trolls weren't exactly a force of good, but in this film it's taken for granted that they are benevolent magical entities who just happen to have power over the minds of human beings.

Even though they give the king of arrendale advice that screws up the lives of both of his daughters for many many years, and quite possibly...

 kidnap a young boy

And then they use a song and dance sequence to coerce a gullible young woman to...

marry a man she just met

(Charming people, really...)

And also conspire to 

'get [her] fiance out of the way'

(But they're really nice.)


I don't buy it. It's another instance in which the story was poorly written because the characters weren't  well developed.


Unless you, like me, see beyond what is on the screen to the true substance of the story. It's obvious that the Trolls have alterior motives. They altered Hans brain and memory, just as they did Anna's, to make him think of killing the two sisters and taking the crown for himself. This is consistent with their designs of making Anna Kristoff's wife by braking her engagement engagement to the man who tried to kill her.

That makes sense, doesn't it?

Does it at least make as much sense as homosexuality and a rebellion from social norms?

I mean, it didn't happen in the film, but you can tell it's definitely a subtext...if you look closely and read through the lines.

...and squint

(The squinting helps)


Or maybe, as my parents keep telling me, 'OK, Mormonhippie, this is a movie. It's not meant for analyzing, it's meant for fun.'

Conclusion:

'Let It Go' is about repressed homosexuality in the same way 'A Whole New World' is about breaking a man breaking a girl's virginity (which means, NOT AT ALL! PERVERT!!!)

Australian Adventure: Sydney Again

We only spent a few days in Sydney before I headed back to the states. We stayed in a suburb in north sydney that was near a university.

The moat importiant thing I wanted to do in australia was see kangaroos in the "wild". Up until now, I'd seen them only in captivity.

Red took me to a place near Lake Macquarie where there were several tribes of kangaroos living in these grass areas near an old hospital.

It was kinda funny (not when it happened, but now) I was seeing "Wild Kangaroos" for the first time and it was kind of a magical experience. But for Red, who has seen them many times before it was like, "Do we really have to walk that whole way?" "You saw the smaller ones, doesn't that count?" and "Okay, you're here, you've seen them where do you wanna go now?"

I'm not saying it wasn't fun, I actually had one of the kangaroos following me around and that was pretty magical. But it was something I wished we'd have done our first week in Sydney.

Red saw me off to the airport the next day.

I took the same route home and I even got to go on a Smaug-plane when I transfered at Auckland.

There was a person sitting next to me but they didn't want to talk.

It was a long flight.

I watched some documentaries about climbing mount everest, a project by Bjork, and three episodes of Vikings (it was interesting but it had pretty graphic content).

My mom and dad picked me up at LAX and took me home.

Australian Adventure: Tasmania

How can I even begin to describe Tasmania?

It's like The World of Warcraft in real life.

It had the sprawling, lush, orderly farmland

(Fruit, Hay, Wool, Lumber industries seemed particularly plentiful)

It has the dense forest and sweeping vistas and cliffs.

The exotic creatures that spawn out of NOWHERE

(and wander right in the middle of the road because they're fearless and none too bright)

It has the big city that everyone but you knows their way around.

A Haunted castle-prison

And EVERYTHING IS CLOSE to EVERYTHING else.

I think its really cool that such a small place can have so much diversity and not feel crowded.

On the first day, Red rented a white car and drove us to Port Arthur. Because she's still not accustomed to driving in australian roads, I came up with a little saying to help her remember what side of the road to stay on

"Left is Theft"

Whenever we entered the road, came to an intersection, made a turn, or got into one of those extremely annoying round-abouts we would use that phrase to remind us to drive on the left side of the road in australia (originally a prison colony, so thieves were sent there).

It was really, really corny (and funny) but we didn't crash the car so I guess it worked!

We listened to epic music on the radio and drove to Port Arthur (The Haunted Castle-Prison) and spent the day touring there.

The prison was established for secondary offenders with the aim of rehabilitation. It was constructed using the principles developed by Jeremy Bentham. I suppose that (for its day) it was a comparatively humaine place to be incarcerated, but by today's standards it is pretty creepy.

Esspecially how the class system was segrigated and the "Separate Prison".

As with the ruins at Cockatoo island in Sydney, we could explore the whole place pretty freely. There was a walking tour, a ferry tour and there was even a ghost tour (We came back for that one at night. I didn't see experience a haunting, but there were some really cool stories of people who lived at Port Arthur...as well as of a prevous 'ghost tour' group who, while visiting the medical examiner's autopsy room/basement, were attacked by a mouse!)

It was cool they had a family history catalogue room there, and they encouraged people who have "convict ancestry" to use it.

They use the phrase "convict ancestry"the same way my family would say "pioneer ancestry" which I thought was weird at first. But I came to learn most of the "convicts" at Port Arthur were not hardened criminals, they were poverty-stricken and the British government didn't know what to do with them. Reading the convicts history, most of them were improvershed, petty criminals, or mentally ill. Serously, if someone in an australian prison-colony stole something or didn't show up for work one day, they were were sent to Port Arthur (the murderers and extremely violent criminals were exicuted).

Australia must be big on performing arts as an educational venue, because they had actors who did skits around the park. They would reinact scenes from the lives of some of the convicts who lived there.

One of the actors dialogue went something like this:

"They sent us here to get rid of us. They don't care about us. If they could have killed all of us with a clean conscious they would have done it."

That is...extremely depressing. And its probably why the "rehabilitation" efforts that took place there were largely not effective.

We also got to hike on two separate trails: one along the shoreline and one into the forest and saw some the wildlife there. But we saw the most animals after dark.

I swear, all the little critters must have signed a suicide-pact because so many of them just stand in the middle of the road after dark.

There isn't even any food there!

The next day we drove around the pennisula: There was so much to see, I think we could have spent the entire time there and not beheld all of it. There were coal mines, and huge cliffs that look like pipe organs, white beaches, and lots and lots of wildlife.

Afterward we drove north (almost to the other side of the state) to a town called Perth. I wished we could have gone all the way to the northern shore, but unfortunately we had to get back to our campsite on the south-ish side of the state.

That night was the first night I'd been able to see the stars, so Red and I went on a "nature walk" and looked for the southern cross.

(I think I should add a little note here: Red wears extremely stylish and attractive glasses whereas I am not able to wear them. As children we would spend long hours outside after dark but it wasn't until she started wearing glasses that she realized the craters on the moon make the shape of a man's face.

Red was convinced I wouldn't be impressed the constillation them because she said (somewhat dismississively: 'Its supposed to be a cross but its just those two stars, over there.'

What I saw was five stars arrainged roughly into the shape of an upside down kite, as if it had gotten stuck in a tree.

When I told her this, Red responded:

"What?!? Whatever, lets go!"

And we went to look at sheep.

The next day we went to church. I really liked the speakers. All of them were older women and they talked about stuff like the love of God, the sabbath, and the atonement. It was gospel that came out of scripture and the heart, not dictated word-for-word by a general conference talk or out of a manual. I think more church's need to have sermons like that.

Later we went driving and to an animal reserve (Kinda like a vet and a zoo put into one)

It was really awesome and I got to pet a koala, a baby wombat, and feed a kangaroo (they didn't let us pet the tasmanian devils, but...you know...you can't have everything!)

When I was a little kid, I went to the San Diego Wild Animal Park with my G.P and that is where I made one of the most importiant decisions in my life:

I thought, "It would be really cool to be a zookeeper and take care of animals."

Then I thought "No, I should be a nurse and take care of babies...and my husband will be a zookeeper. AND HE CAN TAKE ME TO SEE THE ANIMALS!!!"

Those ambitions have remained fairly constent, even though I haven't been fortunate enough to work as a maternal-child care nurse (or marry a zookeeper).

I confided these childhood aspirations to my sister right before we went into the reserve. And there was this...guy...

(And shall we say...he was...a keeper)

Red didn't give me a super-difficult time about it, she actually interacted with him a lot more then I did, but it was funny.

Later we went for another long drive. I think we would have made it to the Creepy Crawlly Walk, except for the gas stations were close and we didn't want to get stranded.

We saw a stupid crow-thing standing right in the middle of the road, on our way out of.town  We didn't hit it but on the way back, we noticed a roadkill that looked suspicously like it. (Seriously? What is the matter with these animals?)

The next day went to the airport, returned the car, and headed back to Sydney.

DON'T READ THIS NEXT PART ITS DUMB

I like to imagine a little possum family living on the land mass that became Tasmania several hundered thousand years ago.  The family grows so they must separate. Eventually forming separate (but related) tribes. (The Tazmanian Tiger, the Tasmanian devil, the opssiom, the kangaroo, and the wombat)

So after thousands upon thousands of years they have a family reunion. To commemorate the loss of their friend The Tasmanian Tiger.

But now they've changed so much they don't recognize each other!

The Smallish-Red-Kangaroo says: "Dude, what happened to you?"

And the Rat-kangaroo/wombat thingy goes:
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT HAPPENED TO ME, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU!?!?!"

And the opossum is all, like: "Hey, yall! What up?! You've changed!"

As the three argue about who has changed the most they don't notice they are standing in the middle of the road and get.hit by a car.

A smallish Bear-Bager arrives and goes: "Ugh! I'm always late for these things."
Another car comes.

Australian Adventure: Melbourne

If you're not familiar with an Australian outlaw by the name Edward (Ned) Kelly, I'd encourage you to look him up sometime. (Maybe here)

Before I'd gotten on the plane for AU I was fascinated by this guy because it seems he was not a mere common criminal.

Bonnie and Clyde robbed banks for kicks, but Ned Kelly robbed banks and BURNED BANK RECORDS so poor people didn't have to pay back their debts.

(Dang, son!)

To this day, there is still a lot of debate as to whether he was a Robin Hood-Style Freedom Fighter or Trouble-Making Bushranger/Terrorist; and although there is probably a bit of truth to both, I'm convinced that he felt he was doing the right thing.

We were fortunate enough to stay in a motel across the street from the Melbourne Gaol (an old prison-turned-museum) where Ned Kelly was imprisoned, tried and executed.

(That's the gaol behind me, across the street.)

And I got to learn more about him when I accidentally took a detour from our "free tour" of the Gaol and started exploring the museum-proper.

It was extraordinary: the interior is a long hallway with three storeys. Prison cells lined each side of the hallway, and inside nearly every cell is a display: typically consisting of a death mask and a plaque along with copies of documents related to the incarceration of the inmate in question.

Pretty much the first thing I started doing was taking pictures (because the sign said it was aloud as long as its not for commercial purposes). I even saw (from a distance) the area where people were executed (I know I shouldn't be so thrilled about that but I was stoked!)

Unfortunately the room was really long and Red was still outside. I figured since I, you know, didn't have a cell phone I should probably stay close by...so I went back outside.

Red was sitting outside and when she learned where I'd been she informed me that I'd just been freeloading off a museum.

 (You're supposed to PAY to get inside the building...OOPS!)

I knew a "free tour" simply wasn't going to do it for me this time. I did go back on a subsequent visit, and paid that time.

The rest of the first day, we spent getting situated, and we did a bit of exploring of the city with one of Red's friends.

She was really nice and took us to a lot of really neat places like a war memorial, the China Town, a HUGE department store with a whole bunch of levels on it (it was so cool taking the escalators!), and tried a "Chocolate Shake" (which is basically just what American's would call "Chocolate Milk") and Creme Brule. Later we went to a vietnamese restaurant (I had a chicken dish that was very good).

 We crossed the Yarra River and went to a place called "Crown", its a Hotel/Casino but it doesn't smell bad like the one's in Las Vegas.

There was a room with dark-ambient lighting and waterfalls that was really relaxing and a restaurant with a huge-ish chocolate fountain with three types of chocolate flowing down and lots and lots of toppings (AKA heaven).

Then we went to a Japanese 99 cent store where all the merchandise is $2.80 (and "Made in China").
I love baking, so I got some really cool chocolate molds, silicone cupcake cups, and a pretty oven mitt.
I saw an extremely bling Iphone case but unfortunately I don't have an Iphone.

Everything was within walking distance and we didn't get lost! (awesome!)

In our hotel I watched Australian Drama TV for the first time. The show was about a respectable Polynesian Family. Actually it was polynesian parents and mixed race kids... because they were adopted...or maybe they just couldn't find actors who looked enough like the parents...

Anyway, this highly respectable family lives on an island and just happens to run a drug cartel. It was weird and not worth watching at all.

The news was OK, but just like the news in the US there's always a bias...at least on the channels we watched.

The next day, Red and I took a bus tour of the great ocean road, which was really pretty.

Melbourne is a bit drier then sydney, but it was still pretty tempurate compared to the desert.

We got to stop hike a temprate rainforest,

 walk on the beach

see wild Koala

see parrots

see the 12 apostles

(no, not those twelve apostles. . .)

and hear stories about secret coves, shipwrecks and lost love, sightseeing and infidelity (all of which were actually true and happened along the great ocean road).And we also got to sing songs with our trusty australian guide.

I also got to try ginger-beer (kinda like root-beer) and honeycomb icecream. Both were very good, tho Red thinks the ginger-beer tastes quite strong.

The next day we explored the city some more.

We went to St Paul's cathedral, the Queen Victoria Market (Which is kind of like a Farmer's Market that's really a Supermarket), and the treasury building. (That was actually a really cool place, it wasn't just a treasury building, it was a whole district of government buildings, we passed by a mint, there was  a church and a bunch of other old buildings, if I ever get to go back I'm going to investigate that area more)

As we were walking about the city I saw what looked like a man working in a manhole. His hands were splayed out on either side of his torso to support his body weight.

I figured, "maybe he's working on electricity lines inderground or pipes, but it
sure looks like he doesn't have any legs"  As we got closer I realized there wad no manhole, and this gentleman was standing on his hands because he didn't have legs.

 I felt really bad and I was so glad I didn't remark about how funny it looked when I first saw him.

And I got to finish seeing the Melbourne Gaol and even though it costs $25 dollars to get in its worth every penny because they let you re-inact stuff!

I'm serious! They give you these props and a script and you get to act. out. a. part. in the trial of Ned Kelly.

 It was so much fun! The whole group I was with seemed to have a really great time, there was a mom, a dad, and a son that played parts and they did a really good job.

 The judge guy was really cool and posed for photos afterwards, and the guy who portrayed Ned Kelly seemed really stoked to be there: he was beaming this beautiful smile the whole time (really out of character for Ned Kelly considering he was tried unfairly, but still awesome...especially when he finally got to talk and gave a powerful and chilling closing speech).

I also got to take part in the watch house experience. I got arrested by "Sargent" (who looked a lot like a younger Jane Lynch with black hair), booked, and put in a dirty-ickky cell for the night, and let out to an activity room in the morning.

(It only took about 20 minutes.)

We left early the next morning for tasmania.

Australian Adventure: Sydney

After we got through customs, Red got us week-long train/bus/ferry passes and we traveled to a suburb about an hour away from the city called Cambelltown.

I'm not partial to the suburban communities, but if I ever have to live in one I'd like to live the way our landlords did.

We stayed in a travel trailer in this back yard. But the backyard was also a garden with vegetables and other plants, a fountain, a grape arbor, a separate room that served as a meditation retreat, a small bathroom to the side and even a small chicken coop in the corner. (The only thing missing was a Koi Pond.)

Whenever I opened the door of the trailer it seemed like one of the couple's toy poodles was out there to see what I was up to.

Everything seemed to be overflowing with life. Its extremely difficult to get plants to grow that way where I am from. It was a peaceful setting and very beautiful.

All we did there was pretty much introduce ourselves and drop off our stuff, but the gentleman was nice enough to drive us back to the train station and advise us to be careful not to hang around the train station too long after dark.

After getting back to the city, Red decided we would walk through Hyde Park on our way to a place called Darling Point (at least I think that was what it was called, it was either that or The Rocks but they're nearby each other). But first we stopped by Coles and got food.

(Coles is not a clothes store, its a grocery store in AU)

We got fruit and I think stuff to make sandwiches (white bread and canned chicken are popular cuisine choices for Red).

Afterward we walked through the urban areas and I proceeded to get completely lost in the city.
(not in a good way)

I was completely disoriented as to which direction we were going. We would turn down a lane or cross a street and turn again. I was sure at several points we were going in circles. I felt out of control and I didn't like it.

Walking through Hyde Park, we stopped and went through the ANZAC Memorial.

(it's sideways because the computer won't let met turn it...Red took the picture.)

 Its for the soldiers from Australia and New Zealand Armies. Started during WWI, when troops from AU and NZ made a batallion to serve in the war. It was apparently a period of time that helped the country define its cultural identity: even though AU was originally a place for outcasts of the British empire, the people of Australia were eager to help the mother country in the war effort. The memorial is a patriotic icon.

It would have been really nice but the whole time we were exploring it we were also carrying these great sacks of food in our hands. It felt really out of place. Like going through the Lincolin Memorial with a shopping cart (which im sure people have done before but i don't think its a good idea)

(Nothing like exploring a war memorial with your groceries)

Then we ate lunch next to Capt. Cook :)

Red was trying to psych me up for this "really cool" thing that turned out to be an underground moving platform :-|

It was pretty long and the walls were painted with new-agey stuff. Red was trying to make the experience a suprise but it didn't work out the way she expected. When we got to the end there was a parking garage, we took an elevator to the open are where a whole bunch of people were standing around.

She said "OK just imagine all of these people aren't here and you can see a hill, the hill is actually the top of a parking garage."

(The hill/park is called "the domain".)

I didn't appreciate this 9th wonder of the world at the time because there were a whole bunch of people standing round us so I couldn't see the hill.

We walked past a bunch of other things (Like a prison and a fountain and a HUGE library and a few other things). Since we were carrying bags and I wasn't dressed nice I didn't want to go inside St Mary's Cathedral (We did go later Tho.)

Then we passed Circular Quay. (I kept pronouncing this place wrong Quay is pronounced like the thing you use to.start your car and pretty much means "a line" as in "to line boats up next to a dock" presumably "Circular Quay" refers to the fact that the dock is shaped in a half-circle, and the boats will have to "line up in a circle" in order to dock.)

Circular Quey is located RIGHT NEXT TO Darling Point. And there is a train station at Circular Quey. So we could have skipped walking through that expansive urban area if we'd we'd started from this point and gone to Hyde Park from here.

Dammit.

Then we found a nice comfy place on the pavement and sat there for the next 8 hours 30 minutes.
I was exhausted in body and mind. And since I'd stopped moving about I was starting to feel it.

I laid down for a while, but as the place started to get more crowded Red insisted I sit or stand.

"You shouldn't be tired, you slept on the plane."

(I should have prayed for the Lord to give me patience. But as it was, I didn't kill Red, so I guess it turned out OK.)

The fireworks came from all different directions: from the opera house in front of us, from the Sydney Harbor bridge to our left, and from some undetermined point behind us.

They had some go off at 9 pm and some people left after that. We got a little closer to the shoreline before things got really really crowded again.

Besides the fireworks, there was this really cool stunt airplane flying about the harbor early in the evening and this extremely annoying and repetitive beatbox music coming from an outdoor pub that persisted throughout the entire period of the time we were there.

The fireworks were pretty cool, but not something I'd ever do again.

On New Years Day we got to sleep and later went to the Sydney Eye. Red said it wasn't that cool, but it was important to me to try to get oriented to the city since I'd done a pretty bad job at it upon my arrival.

I wrote some postcards for my family (That I'd gotten at Woolworths, which is another supermarket there), but couldn't send them off at the highest freaking postbox in the southern hemisphere because when I asked if they sold international stamps they said no :(

It was about this time Red encouraged me to start sharing the experience on FB. I tried to make at least one post a day saying stuff about my trip. I also tried to keep a journal.

We also went to the Queen Victoria Building, which is a Mall right in the middle of a bunch of streets. The pedestrian traffic is so heavy there, they actually stop all four lanes of the intersection near the entrance so people coming from all different directions can get across.

Later we walked across the Harbor Bridge (The one you are allowed to walk across).

 And went to a place called Luna Park: Which is a legit 1930's style amusement park. I guess Red had been there a few times just people watching, but after seeing the anti-gravity one we decided to try a sampler of two of the rides.

The anti gravity one was like being spinned around the inside of a huge bucket so you stick to the walls and the floor beneath you drops. Red was a lot more courageous then i was. She was moving all about and I just wiggled my arms a bit. It was still really fun.

Afterwards we went on a ferris wheel and annoyed the whole world by yelling "Hi!" and waving to random people as if they were the long lost family member we'd been dying to see every time our gondola came down to earth.

One of the days on our way back on the train, we stopped at an outback steakhouse (just to see what it was like cuz you know, it's themed australian) and surprisingly enough they don't try very hard to convince you of that, it actually looks like a regular diner inside...

(In my home country, these would be labeled "mate" and "shelia")

We went along the Sydney Heritage Walk to a place called "the rocks" which is where all these really really old buildings are from when the convicts first came there and they built all their buildings out of...you guessed it

Rocks.

Next we went hiking at the Blue Mountians.  They look a lot like what I think the Grand Canyon might have looked thousands of years ago: covered gum and evergreen trees, a lovely temprate rainforest. And because the trees are so oily, there is a blue-haze when you look out into the distance ("That's why they're called the blue mountians!")

Its also my living vision for Mirkwood.

It was a pretty steep climb down (I was clinging to the side rail on account of my poor footing)

Luckily, we were able to ride a rail on the way back up. (We even lived dangerously and tilted the seats 'suicide'-style.)
Unfortunately I don't currently have any pictures of this leg of our journey because my camera decided to malfunction that day.

Sadness


We went to Manly Beach via ferry. It was pretty funny because we would walk past businesses there and they were called things like "Manly Beauty Parlour".

Gotta love australia and their hugely creative place-names! The beach was pretty crowded, but Red said it isn't most of the year (it is summer in December and January down there and also it was new years holiday)

(We didn't swim that day)

We also took the 'free tour' at the maritime museum (which pretty much consists of walking around the lobby, gift shop, and the haurbor lining it.) If we'd gotten there earlier in the day I would have paid to go inside because there was a Viking exhibit and I have another Ginger sister who loves Vikings and I'd have loved to tell her about it. As it was, I did get a few viking replica things in the gift shop. The historical boats.outside were pretty cool too. One of them was used as a refugee ship during WW2.

It was somewhere around this time that Sherlock Season 3: Episode 1 came out. Our And because I followed the right people on tumblr, my newsfeed was blasted with these glorious gifs of Benedict Cumberbatch long into the early, early, early hours of the morning.

Red and I are single, and virtually every time we walked past a male who in Red's eyes is reasonably attractive she would try to draw my attention to him.

Eventually the interactions would go something like this:

Red: "Hey, look at that cute boy over there!"

Ebster: "Is it Benedict Cumberbatch jumping through a window?"

Red: "No."

Ebster: "Then I DON'T CARE."

Over the weekend, our train had track service so travelers would have to get off and take a bus part of the way. This made he 1 hour trip wards of three hours. Gratefully, we'd decided to go camping on an island in the bay where they used to have a prison, make war ships, and had a school for girls...(not all at the same time, obviously)

It was a really pretty place, and you can do a lot of exploring of these huge old industrial buildings and prison ruins. I kept thinking that there are a lot of places like that in the states (Like the Russian River Fort in Northern California, which I was fortunate enough to see and explore...before it got locked up) But they are locked up and no one actually gets to explore them in the same way.

It was breeding season for the seabirds on Cockatoo Island, so they were super-aggressive and territorial, we got harassed by them several times. (Once at night, while Red and I were ghost-hunting, which was very very funny).

The next day we went to church. It was testimony meeting sunday, which is when members of the congregation are invited to the pulpit. Sometimes it is very uplifting, and people share a devotional, a scripture or a spiritual experience. Other times people use it as a way to introduce themselves whilst crying. This meeting was a little bit of both. We stayed for the whole three hours.

The church was in a tall city building, which was kinda cool and different from what I'm used to.


Afterward we went to the Botanical Gardens and the Opera House (which is actually peach colored-looking, I'd always thought it was silver/white).

The park on the way there is like a fourm set up for public display and debate. I met a guy who advocates the translation of english into a photonic (sound based) language. And saw a guy named Mr Bashful who didn't seem all that bashful at all.

 (They have this weird automatic bathroom thing.That was a bit freaky.)

There was also a display on the conversion of energy to matter using the egyption god horus: it showed how different symbols in his icon were meant to represent different steps in the process.

All very fascinating.

At the botanical guardens, there were these pools in the botanical guarden with fish and eels in them. The eels look like really long fish...like snake-fish...but their faces were pretty similar. I kept saying stupid things to Red, such as "Do you hear that, Highness? Those are the shrieking eels! They always make that sound when they're about to feed on human flesh!"

(But we fed them breadcrumbs from the ruined loaf of white bread instead).

The last day we went to Bondi (the last letter is pronounced like the letter itself, it does not take the place, or have the value of the letter Y. (Which I think is dumb).

And my camera broke (which was also dumb)

We also went to a bunch of other places along the coastline, including a place that is so notourios as a place to commit suicide that there are cameras set up along the cliffside walk. Very, very sad. But also fascinating, because I'm morbid like that.

The next day we flew to Melborne.

Edit: a few more pictures just cuz I want to..

 (St Mary's Cathedral)

(Red Punching a T-Rex during our "free tour" of a sydney museum)

A Lovely Cockatoo Island Sunset 

(This is the outside wall of a big, tall "green" building)

We also went to a cool art museum, but unfortunately it was illegal to take pictures there.

I learned about an art series called 100 aspects of the moon, it was beautiful and I loved the the asian folk tales behind each of the pieces I saw.

I also saw a big huge version of this touching picture:

(